After slicing her foot in two, Kim Kardassian (27) somehow has found the strength to still go on Shameless Self Promotion with the Stars.

        An insider to the show reports that LargeAssian has been nothing but a total bitch.  "She was demanding special treatment and even insisting on veto power over her which ballroom professional would become dance partner". 

        Her humungous ass is gonna need two partners.  One for each cheek. 

        Kim has been ”a bit too pushy and inquisitive.” “We’re beginning to wonder if she’s worth it!” says the insider.  Of course she's worth it!  Her fat ass will do the Rumba and President Bush will interrupt the show to declare California in a state of emergency....come on, that's just good TV.

 

        Jesse McCartney (21) sings T-Pain's "Buy You A Drank". 

        It's pretty good, if you like hearing the same shit sung by a different person.  I'm sure T-Pain is thrilled.  Now if we can just get DMX to sing a little Miley Cyrus my day will be complete.

 

        Trailer trash junkie, Kiki Dunst (26) traded in Spiderman for Mac boy Justin Long (30).  The two were seen kissing and groping at Sunset strip in LA over the weekend.

        "There were making out hard core while waiting in line for Margaritas"  A witness said, in between vomiting.  "They were  holding hands and were all over each other."

        First Drew BarryWhore and now Kiki... Man that dude Long is a stud.  How does he keep getting these depressed, emotionally unstable, substance abuse whores to go out with him?  He's definitely the MAC.

         

        Here's troll skank, Mary-Kate Olsen leaving a Radiohead concert in Hollywood yesterday without any pants on.  Doesn't she have her own clothing line?  Is that Gomer Pile lumber jack flannel part of the collection?  Cus if it is, where do I go to get one?

 

        We are sad to report that hip hop mogul, Dr. Dre's (43) son, Andre Young Jr. was found dead at Dre's Woodland Hills Home last weekend. 

        Andre Jr. was supposedly out Friday night and returned home around 5:30 A.M. His mother went to check on him in his bedroom around 10 A.M. the next morning and found him unresponsive. She

         Andre was only 20 years old.  Police/Investigators are waiting on the results of a toxicology report.

        R.I.P

        Yesterday we told you all about Heidi Manfag (21) and the making of her new music video Comatosin' .  Well here's the actual video.  This could quite possibly be the worst thing ever.  And not just on t.v.

        If you just ate lunch or you're not on any drugs, we apologize in advance.

        I'm not well read, but this has to be some form of Asian torture.

        That's right... you guys better be nice to us or we'll find more Heidi Manfag videos and bring you one a day for the rest of your pathetic lives. 

    

 

        Above is Hayden Puntagorda who celebrated her 19th birthday this weekend at her home in LA.    I sure hope that she wished for her daddy to stop bitch slapping her mommy before she blew out her bday candles.

        She's only 19 so I won't give her shit about having the body of a prepubescent sea gnome. 

 

        Hayden Peanutfairy comments on her daddy beating the living shit out of her mamma:

        We thinkest Hayhay lives in denial because she wasn't there to save her mamma from being beaten and battered.  Isn't that how Spiderman started out?  Interesting... We're not saying that NBC producers paid her daddy to bitch slap her mamma, but... Interesting...

 

        My Booty's Like Wonderbread singer, John Mayer (30) has been feeling lonely after breaking up with his true love... the pappos.

        A source told MSNBC's The Scoop that John has been tipping off the paps to his whereabouts but they can't be bothered. The source said, “He thinks he’s famous as Jen now. Last week he went to a party, tipped off the paps, and even had decoy cars at the ready when he was leaving. Nice, but no one bothered to follow them, which made John think he ‘lost’ everyone, when really no one bothered to follow him.”

        Wow...that's a little bit pathetic.  Hey you can still play gayelle twister with Perez Hilton and Pete "pansy" Wentz. 

 

        Jessica Simpson arriving at LAX yesterday with her annoying little dog.  Simpson is set to perform tonight at the California State Fair.  That's where her goofy ass belongs... a state fair.

        Simpson answered questions about her reputation as a dumb slut and her *cough* fans *cough* booing her in Wisconsin while being interviewed:

        Poor dumb bitch!  If Tony had 25 friends and family at that show... that just means that Tony's family was booing your ass.

        Stupid hoe... you burping and falling on your ass is EXACTLY what we see in the tabloids.  That's why people think you're a walking bean bag with tits.